This may be a delayed review of machete, but I knew that I was going to  see it again. Sometimes movies like this, even though they are not as  complex as others might be, go by so fast. Sometimes the hype is so  great you come into it with a veiled lens of expectation. Whatever you  see in the film would be mired with disappointments and alterations. So,  I saw the movie again, and I have to say that I really enjoyed it,  though I greedily was hoping for more in the end.

Machete provides generously with an all-star cast of: Danny  Trejo, Steven Seagal, Robert Deniro, Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba,  Don Johnson, Jeff Fahey, Cheech Marin, Lyndsey Lohan amongst others. The  story sets around a Mexican Federali called Machete, who is betrayed,  framed and left for dead. He goes out for blood curdling vengeance  against all those who have wronged him.

The movie is gory, to the point of being cartoony, but that's okay  because it is all tongue in cheek. He's chopping guys heads in half,  swinging from windows with someone's intestines, gouging, hacking,  running over and smashing bad guys left and right. This is one of those  movies where it's better to see with lots of people. The expressions  that people have watching this is priceless.

I won't get into the political aspects of the content of the movie. All  in all, in my opinion, the things said in the movie can be taken as  seriously as the realism. This is a Grindhouse movie down to the  exploding skulls and motorcycle flying 20 feet in the air firing a  machine gun down the front. It's all for show and it's all very cheeky.

Danny Trejo plays a magnificent role and truly you believe just  looking at him that he will pierce your inner organs at the slightest  impulse. He's not someone you want to bump into at 2 in the morning.  Steven Seagal plays a believable villain as Torres, a druglord who has a  history with Machete. Cheech Maron is hilarious as the priest and  brother of Machete. I truly enjoyed how the characters were played by  Don Johnson, Robert Deniro, and yes even Lyndsey Lohan.

The problem I had though with the film was that the beginning was so  grimy and quintessentially exploitation; the quality so akin to a B  movie, that as the movie progressed it never maintained the same  consistency. The first quarter of the movie was so bloody and  ridiculously gory that one almost felt you were in for a special treat.  That it would be a joy ride of excess and monotonous violence, but as  the movie went on, the slow points and the blood letting waned. The  final battle almost seemed like not only was it rushed, but left one  thinking that the beginning of the movie was not a warm up of what was  to come later but was the height of the experience. It left you wanting  more. Shouldn't the ending the main glorious limb flying, howling event  that we paid the 12 dollars for? At that point can you blame me for  being blood thirsty?

All in all I didn't take the plot holes seriously, as like I said, it  was intended to be just slash porn. Still, I think it would have been so  simple for this movie to just provide us with what we intended to see:  an escapist journey through just raw unadulterated vile action. So, on  one hand you have a movie which kind of leaves one hanging, and on the  other hand a movie which provides the action fan with scenes that are  more than worth the movie ticket price. If there is a rating I could  give this movie I would have to give this a 3 out of 5.

In other words:
3 Eight Balls out of 5.